Sunday, November 23, 2008

A Special Message from Lisa

November is a difficult month for me and at the same time it’s the happiest. My brother’s birthday is Nov 5, my daughter’s is Nov 25, my husband’s is Nov 27 and my dad’s is Nov 29.

My husband Steve is the best thing that has ever happened to me. He is truly my best friend. Then when we became pregnant in March of 2006 I was so overwhelmed because I’ve wanted to have a baby for such a long time. But it took me a long time to find the right person to start a family with. Then Lillian was born on November 25, 2006. She is my Sunshine, my everything. 

But during all this time of joy, my dad, David V. Neily has been declared a “Missing Person” under mysterious circumstances since April of 2006; which happens to be my birth month. He also never knew I was pregnant because I wasn’t able to reach him before he became missing.

I’m thankful each day that my dad was at my wedding in July 2005 and gave me away along with my Mom; Betty and Step-dad; Lou. That was the last time I saw him. It was most special during the Father/Daughter dance. And no matter the outcome of my dad, I have photos and video that I will have forever. And I’m so grateful for that.

So, these past three years have been bitter sweet. I first put this letter together November 2006 and for some reason never sent it or posted it until now. I started the letter before creating this blog. Although I had to update it a bit. 

It’s been the most difficult time I have ever had to go through (and I’m still going through) and at the same time, it has been the best time of my life. I have a daughter and husband who I love very much. And family and friends who I also love very much.

But my heart has an emply place. Through the years I didn’t really spend a whole lot of time with my dad since my parents divorced when I was seven. He lived in Northern CA and I lived in Southern CA. He was diagnosed when he was teenager as Bi-Polar. But most of my experiences with him he was “dad”. You couldn’t tell he was sick. But even so, just knowing he is missing, breaks my heart. I miss him so much and I think about him everyday. His best friend Sue wrote to me and said "Every time I see someone who looks remotely like him, my heart jumps and I turn and stare". I have also had the same experience.

I’ll never feel whole again but I would feel much better if I knew what happened to him and that the person responsible was put behind bars for a very long time. I sometimes can’t sleep at night because I miss him so much and wonder what he went through his last days. Our family wants justice and closure because Jim DeNoyer is a person of interest in my dad’s case and also Jim’s uncle’s case.

I look at Lillian and wish I could give my dad a call and get advice on raising her. He taught us never to lie or steal. When I read to Lillian it reminds me when my dad read to me. He would actually talk like the characters he was reading about. This is one of many memories I will never forget. People make fun of me sometimes because I’m always taking pictures or video where ever we go with Lillian. But there is a good reason for it. I want her to know about her life as much as I can so if anything ever happens to me or her dad, she will always have a scrapbook of her life.

Before my dad went missing under mysterious circumstances he wrote details on the back of photos I was storing for him. I have so many that he was never able to finish writing about. He has an amazing memory. He told me I was tenacious and I plan on living up to that by not giving up to find answers to what happened to him.

I guess in a selfish way, I’m posting this because our family and I need all the support we can get. And if anyone has any resources that could help us find him, please let us know. 

My next post I will write details of what has been done to find him and the struggle our family has had with people not wanting to listen to our side. It has been an absolute nightmare.

A LITTLE ADVICE FROM ME:
Make a New Year’s Resolution to Spend Quality Time With the People You Love & Care About. Because You Never Know When It May Be Your Last Chance.

I LOVE YOU ALL VERY MUCH! And I wish you all a Happy 2009!
Lisa, loving daughter of David V. Neily